I don’t
know about you, but I thought St. Patrick’s Day was a celebration of Irish
culture (well, actually it started out as a celebration of the arrival of
Christianity in Ireland, but nothing lasts forever). I don’t know when it became a drink fest for
Americans (and other nationalities, I’m sure); and I also don’t know when the
poor Irish had to start tolerating what goes on across the globe each March 17th
in celebration of their culture.
Anything and everything green and things that have never been green before are selling like pints of beer in a pub on a St. Patrick’s Day parade route anywhere between here and Dublin. There are the usual wearables available (shamrock beads and such) and then there are the unique items that are, frankly, embarrassing and an insult to anyone Irish. I, for one, want to take a stand. As a purveyor of parties, I apologize to the entire country of Ireland, its residents and its forebears.
If you were truly Irish, would you be caught dead in a green LED Mohawk wig or a St. Patrick’s Day feather fascinator? Only if you’re plowed.
I can tolerate green hair extensions, but I would absolutely choke if I saw someone wearing a St. Patrick’s Day top hat that comes complete with a green beard that looks more like a wet mop than facial hair -- unless I was on my fourth green ale, of course.
Last but not least, I may think I’m having an out of body experience if I see a dog dressed as a leprechaun or a human dressed as the General Mills Lucky Charms icon. Well, maybe not, if I just finished watching the St. Bernard Irish Italian Islenos Parade or attending the Greek-Irish Society St. Patrick’s Day Ball and am still trying to understand what or how that happened.
But then again, if you can turn a river green…
Have a good St. Pat’s—and be safe.
The Party Girl
